Friday, April 09, 2010

Fra-jee-lay: A Major Award and other things, including bullets!

This is how busy it's been for me this week...I spaced out that the Masters is this week! So the quick thoughts on that:
  • Good for Tiger! With all the crap focused on him over the past few months, and the golf media's messianic coverage of his return, he showed that he is still the #1 guy on the course.
  • Still don't like him though.
  • Freddie Couples, Tom Watson and Phil Mickelson at the top of the leaderboard after Day 1? Priceless!
  • CBS rolled out it's first live 3D broadcast coverage for this weekend. Wish I could see what that's got to look like!
  • Check out the Masters website. Pretty impressive this year.

Thanks to all of those who participated over at "...the Other HNT" yesterday. We had 31 posts. Not the 40 I had hoped for, but pretty darned impressive! A wonderful mix of photos, and some great starts for some newbies. Four years--who'da thunk it?!?
I got an email yesterday afternoon that I was going to just ignore, but then I got chatting with a friend about it, who encouraged me to write about it. But that got me to thinking. Which is often a dangerous thing. So I'll write about the thinking part first.

I may piss some people off with this, but I haven't done that in awhile, and it seems that it's currently in vogue. It has to do with sexblogs. And sexbloggers. I'll just come right out and say it. A vast majority of you who think you're sexbloggers--you aren't. Regardless of how many people think that you are. There is a big difference between blogging about sex, and being a sexblogger. I find that I'm not alone in this view, though not many people would rock the boat over labels. So here, with a nod to Jeff Foxworthy, are my views:
  • If all you do is post naked pictures pulled from various sites off the internet--you are not a sexblogger.
  • If all you do is post naked pictures of yourself, particularly in some sort of weird fetish or kinky situation--you are not a sexblogger. (But they can be interesting.)
  • If most of your posts are about you having sex, whether real or fantasy or erotica--you are not a sexblogger.
  • If you occasionally write some sort of "review" for some sex toy you've received for free--you are not a sexblogger.
  • If your site only updates for your HNTs--you are not a sexblogger. (But we do appreciate the direct access to them.)
  • If your site mentions your sexual conquests of the weekend, whether it's with or without your spouse, and then you write about your kid getting an "A" on his/her spelling test in the next day's post--you are not a sexblogger.
  • If your site makes an incestuous "Top Sex Bloggers" list (which is more of a popularity contest) in which 90% of the sites listed fit in the above statements--you are not a sexblogger.
"So Os", you might ask. "What constitutes a 'sexblog' to you?" Glad you asked:
  • A good sexblog is much less personal (though not totally devoid of a personal touch).
  • A good sexblog is written with some research prior to writing.
  • A good sexblog presents current discussions about sex and sex-related topics.
  • A good sexblog is someplace I'd turn to if I were looking for discussion or answers.
  • A good sexblog will give many links to supporting and dissenting views and opinions.
  • A good sexblog will often link to advertisers, but rarely will review for those advertisers.
  • A good sexblog will often promote sex-friendly events on local and/or national levels. And many times with personal insights.
  • A good sexblog will often times be quite devoid of any sort of naked pictures.
"OK, Mr. High and Mighty. Who do you think among us is a sexblogger?" Well, I'm not so dumb as to actually list those who I think are and especially who aren't, but I would make special mention of Figleaf. For my money, the best sexblogger amongst "us". Edited to add Shay over at The S Spot. Great place to get questions answered. And contests! A couple of what I would call the New York sexbloggers would make the list. Two or three others, maybe, but that's about it. It's not to say that I don't enjoy reading everyone who thinks they're a sexblogger. Nor do I think those people should change what they do. But I just have to snicker when I see someone refer to themselves as a "sexblogger" just because they fuck a lot then write about it.

And what brought all this on? I received an email Thursday afternoon, excerpts of which are:
"I have some good news for you: your site Views from the Back Row has been chosen by Í´≈Ïø®µß.com Editors (not really their site's name) as a 2010 Best Pick! I'm the Editor-in-Chief of Í´≈Ïø®µß, which since 1998 has been one of the world's largest online adult communities."

"We began scouring the web for the best, finest, funniest, and most informative adult sites and blogs. I'm happy to inform you that your site Views from the Back Row was chosen by our Editors to represent the very Best the Web has to offer."
*And again*

Have these people ever read my blog?? In almost 5 years of blogging, the closest I've come to discussing sex are the posts about my slut girlfriend bird fornicating with any bird that comes calling out on my balcony (more to write about there, too!). Unless talking about symphony moves, diabetes and whatever other drivel I type out here constitutes sex.
"You may claim a recognition badge for your site. Our badges are a mark of distinction..."

Apparently, if I put up their badge, I'll be recognized as having a Sexblog (an award winning one, too!). I'll be the place where tens of thousands of others will come to read my wisdom and such on such thought-provoking sex topics as Grizzly football, OsTour trips and my medical condition. Well, you know what? I don't want it! I am not a sexblogger. This is not a sexblog. I am fully aware of that. The friend I mentioned at the top made the comment that there's plenty of people out here that would kill for such recognition. Which is probably true. And which is what got me to thinking about "sexblogs". I figure there's plenty of you out there that think you have a real sexblog. At least as much so as mine is. So my badge is up for bid. It's a commodity I'm willing to sell to the highest bidder. Just be sure to send a nekkid picture with your bid.

If I want to reject my inclusion (which implies I'm already included), I'm supposed to email directly to the Editor-in-Chief. I think I'll just let them come by and read it here themselves.


Dana said...

*gives a standing ovation*

I couldn't agree with you more on the sexbloggers, who they are, and who they are not. I would love to throw a couple more blogger-wanna-labels in here but then I'd get *myself* in trouble on your blog and heaven knows I am quite capable of doing plenty of that on my own blog!

And no ... I'll not be bidding on that badge but I might send you a nekkid picture some day *wink*

Anonymous said...

Good golly Os...that's a lot of words. Diabetes is sexy beotch!

Elle said...

Well, if you did accept that badge, then you'd have to re-write your definition of sexbloggers ;)

Honestly, without giving it much thought and without having read your definitions, I'd have called myself a sex blogger. Just because my blog is mainly about sex. But "sexblogger" is just a label, and not one I care about, really. My blog's my blog.

So your post made me think, a little (as much as my brain can manage before finishing my first coffee of the day) but it did not offend me ;)

Anonymous said...

I'm wondering how many people you're gonna send up in arms with this post!

I think there is a difference between what you describe, and people who call themselves sexbloggers, which I have done myself in the past. I would argue that your blog being predominantly about sex, even if it's not intellectual, educational articles does make you a sexblogger. I think both can be sex blogs, it's just a different approach. But it does make you think!

---Amy xxxx

Anonymous said...

I agree. the end.

Elle said...

Perhaps the difference is a blog about one's own sex and a blog about sex in general. If the blog is about one's own sex, maybe we should just call it "naughty" and be done with the argument? :D

Ms Scarlett said...

I have to say that I agree too. I've never really considered myself a sexblogger, even if I do write about sex occasionally.

Enjoy the Masters!!

Semi-Celibate Man said...

If I could add a little twist, I think that the important distinction in "sexblogger" is in the word blogger, not the word sex.

If you post any personal detail - rather than reviews, advice, etc. - then you are a blogger. Otherwise, you have a website. :)

And, if you've posted NSFW material in addition - picture, video, or prose - then you are a sex, naughty, or erotic blogger.

My two cents.

Hubman said...

Since when do labels matter so much?

the guy some people (Dana, who won't read me anymore because of all the sex content) think is a sex blogger, but who doesn't consider himself a sex blogger

Richard, Shhh... said...

Well, I may tell friends & acquaintances that I have a SECRET blog (but I KEEP it secret, too) that I use for HNT posts and to "read" more HNT blogs. Then, I give a little HNT propaganda to the PRETTY ones in particular hoping they will want something more! But I don't claim to be a sexblogger altho I DO like to share info (both ways--in AND out) about sex! If I HAVE any interesting facts or concerns, I share them & wait for things to hit the fan. HNT'ers are so damned nice, they have been supportive or politely quiet where the people in my "real" world overload me regularly with their self-centered pettiness and parochial imitations of "the GOOD Life!" HA!

BTW, I figured "Basso" was SOME bass instrument but, with a trombone, you've gotta have a good Latin "Os" (for mouth as in OSCULATE), eh? Enjoyed your post!

Anonymous said...

i love when monikers are discussed and debated. it helps stimulate the gray matter. :D

and y'know...i'm not sure which i dislike more, basketball or golf. at least golf inspires cute argyle socks. ;)

Cute but Evil said...


rage said...

This was a great post O! It was nice to hear what the definitions of sex blogger were versus the "Other genres" of adult blogging.

Lucky for me I fall into the "Craptacular" blogs.

Ciao Bella!

Cheeky Minx said...

I'm not sure if I can really enter this debate, since I've been around for a blogging nanosecond by comparison!

While I can definitely see your point, I also think tightly defined labels can often be exclusionary. I like the fact that a variety of people across the globe are writing about sex, real or imagined, from their own time and place.

As for my own label, I tend to say I write 'stuff'! I just hope the authenticity of my own experience, sexual or otherwise, comes through in the end.

Ooh, sorry, kinda long-winded. Great post - it's had me thinking for a few days... ;)

Ms. Inconspicuous said...

Funny, I was always grouped in with the "sexblogger" set, and I never thought of myself as one, and even sort of resented the label. I'm not sure what's so lucrative or appealing about being pigeonholed like that.

Lil Bit said...

*standing up and applauding!!!*

This may very well be my favorite post of yours, Os (HNTs notwithstanding, of course, lol)

GOOD FOR YOU on rejecting your inclusion on this group of bloggers who write a bunch of sextoy reviews for free shit and call themselves "sex bloggers".
Ooooh, touch you, hoity-toity of the elite community. Meh, whatevah.
Yeah, I said it, what of it? LOL

*still standing and clapping MORE*


ps. to comment on an earlier comment in this post, lol... sorry OHNT didn't make it to 40 like you had hoped. At least I did my lil part to try to help out. ;)