Things That Might Have Been Heard at the Doctor's...

Remember back in mid-July when I fell between the loading dock and the equipment truck? In the midst of preparing for the symphony's summer concert? Many of you hinted I should go see a doctor. I don't go to the doctor's office much. Mostly because I know what's going to be said, but they'll charge me alot, and make me buy all sorts of meds. I finally went to the Urgent Care on Wednesday.

• "Fifty." (I believe that's the first time I've had to answer that. I choked on it a little.)
  
• "Is your blood pressure usually high?" (Is xxx/xxx considered high?)
  
• "Does this hurt?" (Wouldn't the fact that my ass is a full foot off the chair indicate a big 10-4 to that?)
  
• "Hmmm...We're going to take another couple of x-rays..." (No, they wouldn't let me have them)
  
• "It doesn't appear that there's anything wrong with your knee, other than a little arthritis..." (*blink, blink*)
  
• "It looks like you had a large hematoma..." (Hence the swelling up like a ripe watermelon)

Monday night, while asleep, I rolled over and felt a pain in my leg I've never experienced before. The only way to describe it is that it felt like I was tearing my inner leg parts apart. Or like stretching and reopening a leg wound. And this was simply from wiggling my toes a little. So yes, the fear of God sent me to the internet to download some Workers' Comp forms (thanking Him profusely for the fact that I was, in fact, covered!). I turned them in to the Symphony office, but still didn't know if I was going in or not. I didn't seem to have problems, other than when pointing my toes up ("so don't point your toes up..."). Like any doctor-fearing patient, I figured it would go away.

The next night, it happened again. I reached down to rub my leg, and I knew then that I was in trouble. Even the lightest touch would trigger this pain. Like when sheets slid across it. I knew that if I tried to squat down on the balls of my feet, my leg would open up and... well, have you ever ripped apart a chicken drumstick? Same thing. So I went to Urgent Care.

I never did see a doctor. The physician's assistant (just like Moose!) who spoke in a thick Russian accent (oh, my, I love that!) took care of me. She massaged my leg (not in a good way) and made it hurt like hell. I think she smiled. The x-rays didn't show anything, and basically she told me that I bled internally, along with other fluidy things, and it was just now getting reabsorbed. The pain is coming from my muscles, which have been stiff and crowded, and from my nerve endings, which were damaged and just coming back to life. Expect another 6-8 weeks of this pain. I think she smiled again. Moose told me the same thing last night, and I KNOW she was smiling.

So the final thoughts--they didn't really tell me anything I didn't know before. Other than my leg wasn't being torn to shreds. So that's good. Workers' Comp took care of the bill. So that's good, too. The arthritis comment took me by surprise, but doesn't surprise me a great deal. My blood pressure really is xxx/xxx, but it wasn't anywhere near that high when my tooth was extracted, so I blame the heat and smoke. I'll take care of it, but I'm not concerned about it.

And no, that's not my leg up above...